Chris! OMFG. This is not only brilliant, but one of the funniest things I've EVER read. I literally lost count of the times I laughed reading this, either at the situations or the wording or the details. It's just masterclass on all fronts. I'm going to check out some of your other more recent writing and then come back and read this again. On a related note.... I have (now in my 60s) not been on a date in over 12 years thanks to a wonderful relationship--the healthiest that I've ever been in. But some of this stuff that you write reminds me of stories told to me by my second ex, the one that I thought was the One. She wasn't, but we remain friends and she told me about her subsequent dating post-me episodes and they contain similar kinds of wacky, you-gotta-be-shitting-me, stories like the the Sport Coat Guy who aggressively tried to force her to take a series of tennis lessons with him and got upset when she declined- he had bought her the tickets already on a FIRST date! Another one: a guy showed up in suit/tie at a fancy eatery -- completely hammered and said "look, we can sit here for a while or you can just give me a ....(fill in blank)". She excused herself to the ladies' room and snuck out the back. One guy, also drunk, at an expensive hotel restaurant, got quickly annoyed with her anti-racism stance on life, and got in her face and said "you're not as pretty as thought! ..you look older ..." and to cap it off loudly proclaimed... "all women are prick-teasers!" WTF is wrong with men!? seriously? I mean, naturally, of course, ahem, present company excepted :-)
I often think many single 60+ men, usually those who are divorced, are looking for the perfect “10” that they feel they didn’t get in their ex-wife. Never mind that they are not and likely never were a “10” themselves. But perhaps they are just as “picky” about re-coupling as we women are.
OMG I’m dying 😂🤣☠️ I’m pushing 60, single (divorced) and have zero interest in dating anyone, but especially not men my age and older. I have some treasured friendships with men young enough to be my sons and love my “bonus Mom” role, and they don’t care what I look like and are happy to lift heavy objects for me when necessary. I feel sorry for older men but keep my distance from their mess.
I’m crying. The sheer number of men in this piece who are apparently “38 in spirit” but need a woman to locate the Lipitor, call an Uber and assess the prostate is magnificent.
Also, “laundry hamper that gained sentience” deserves preservation in the British Library. 😂🍒
And I'm sorry, but most women have already damaged their feet too badly wearing high heels through their teens, 20s, 30s, and 40s to be wearing them anymore much past 50. Please. Try a pair on, I invite you. There's a reason Terence Stamp was in such a bad mood all the way through the filming of "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert."
"We want romance and sparkle, and our “baseline visual attraction” is women in their 20s. Think Natalie Harp. Pretty, slim, large breasts, feminine dresses and high heels, longish blond hair, plump lips, nice round bottom. A woman like Natalie is the natural preference of all men, though those of us who are more open-minded may be willing to settle for a woman in her 30s."
Whelp. No one your age or anywhere close is going to look like that, and since to all men, looks are the most important thing ... good luck with the 20- and 30-year-olds. SOMEthing tells me, they are NOT looking for you.
Chris! OMFG. This is not only brilliant, but one of the funniest things I've EVER read. I literally lost count of the times I laughed reading this, either at the situations or the wording or the details. It's just masterclass on all fronts. I'm going to check out some of your other more recent writing and then come back and read this again. On a related note.... I have (now in my 60s) not been on a date in over 12 years thanks to a wonderful relationship--the healthiest that I've ever been in. But some of this stuff that you write reminds me of stories told to me by my second ex, the one that I thought was the One. She wasn't, but we remain friends and she told me about her subsequent dating post-me episodes and they contain similar kinds of wacky, you-gotta-be-shitting-me, stories like the the Sport Coat Guy who aggressively tried to force her to take a series of tennis lessons with him and got upset when she declined- he had bought her the tickets already on a FIRST date! Another one: a guy showed up in suit/tie at a fancy eatery -- completely hammered and said "look, we can sit here for a while or you can just give me a ....(fill in blank)". She excused herself to the ladies' room and snuck out the back. One guy, also drunk, at an expensive hotel restaurant, got quickly annoyed with her anti-racism stance on life, and got in her face and said "you're not as pretty as thought! ..you look older ..." and to cap it off loudly proclaimed... "all women are prick-teasers!" WTF is wrong with men!? seriously? I mean, naturally, of course, ahem, present company excepted :-)
I often think many single 60+ men, usually those who are divorced, are looking for the perfect “10” that they feel they didn’t get in their ex-wife. Never mind that they are not and likely never were a “10” themselves. But perhaps they are just as “picky” about re-coupling as we women are.
Ouch!
Notice that you are not one of these dudes? No way, no how.
OMG I’m dying 😂🤣☠️ I’m pushing 60, single (divorced) and have zero interest in dating anyone, but especially not men my age and older. I have some treasured friendships with men young enough to be my sons and love my “bonus Mom” role, and they don’t care what I look like and are happy to lift heavy objects for me when necessary. I feel sorry for older men but keep my distance from their mess.
Glad you see this for what it is… their mess. Love your alternative.
I’m so grateful to be bisexual!
Late blooming lesbians are not uncommon.
I’m surprised that there are as many hetero women as there are 🤷🏽
Right?!
I’m crying. The sheer number of men in this piece who are apparently “38 in spirit” but need a woman to locate the Lipitor, call an Uber and assess the prostate is magnificent.
Also, “laundry hamper that gained sentience” deserves preservation in the British Library. 😂🍒
😂
And I'm sorry, but most women have already damaged their feet too badly wearing high heels through their teens, 20s, 30s, and 40s to be wearing them anymore much past 50. Please. Try a pair on, I invite you. There's a reason Terence Stamp was in such a bad mood all the way through the filming of "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert."
👍🏼
"We want romance and sparkle, and our “baseline visual attraction” is women in their 20s. Think Natalie Harp. Pretty, slim, large breasts, feminine dresses and high heels, longish blond hair, plump lips, nice round bottom. A woman like Natalie is the natural preference of all men, though those of us who are more open-minded may be willing to settle for a woman in her 30s."
Whelp. No one your age or anywhere close is going to look like that, and since to all men, looks are the most important thing ... good luck with the 20- and 30-year-olds. SOMEthing tells me, they are NOT looking for you.
😂
This made my day, week and month! 🤣
Bravo. The diner photo with Hemingway, Bannon and the Tate brother was genius.
Lol! "Genius." Yeah, Mr. Creator of the blog title, "Men On Pause."
This was amazing.
Go right ahead. Stroke my ego.
OMFG! True!! All of it!! 🤣🤣🤣
Thank you so much!! 💕
Yur welcome 😂