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Armand Beede's avatar

Penny Nickels and Chris Andrews: Er . . . I liked the exchange, too, between you and Hannah Olufs, below!

In which regard, I have to take joy in the fact that "The Onion" now owns "Infowars" after Alex Jones (Yuck!) went into bankruptcy. Now, maybe, "Infowars" WILL be worth looking at!

Penny Nickels: The scoop is about events that save our Republic.

Your scoop essentially pictures what Abraham Lincoln, in his incarnation as Kamala Harris, does to quell the insurrection.

Damned good.

Penny Nickels: Please keep this coming.

The closing with R.E.M., "End of the World as we know it" was a nice touch.

In your paper's "Vegetable" column, it was reported that 51% voted to "deport the majority of farmworkers and food processing employees."

So, please, to all my friends: Don't just read the headlines.

There are some real gems planted in the rest of the paper.

One very good tip:

"Where do vegetables actually come from. Not from Elon Musk, that is for sure."

Now, THAT line is worth carrying with you the rest of the day.

OMG, THAT line has me laughing, even as I write! OMG, YOU just put tears (from laughter) in Armando's eye that will carry me through . . .

I don't think I will soon forget the development of the theme, it is a very good question to ponder where vegetables come from . . .

Touché!

Penny Nickels, I LOVE your newspaper.

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Chris Andrews's avatar

Hope I got all the government/defense/civics stuff right. Was worried I'd miss something.

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Armand Beede's avatar

Chris Andrews: Your work is right on!

(Armando: Judge Advocate: USMC (1975-78), USAF (1978-1983), Reserves: USAF, 1983-2003); Civil Service: USAF (Counsel): 1984-1986; Navy Office of General Counsel: 1987-2016)). So my whole professional life was Navy and Air Force. Your work looked authentic to me. I LOVE what you do!

I am still laughing at that line: "Where do vegetables actually come from. Not from Elon Musk, that is for sure!"

It pays to read the fine print in your writing! LOL!

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Chris Andrews's avatar

You are amazing!

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Chris Andrews's avatar

Thank god

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Hannah Olufs's avatar

I may be dense, but this is satire, right? Sounds like Alexandra Petri. WTAF?

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Chris Andrews's avatar

Oh yeah. Satire.

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Hannah Olufs's avatar

Thanks. It was hilarious. Then I thought hopefully....

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Laura's avatar

Oh Penny you have outdone yourself! What a scoop. Didn't know you were pals with Big Gretch. This made my morning 😀

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Chris Andrews's avatar

Big Gretch is the best. ❤️

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Mike's avatar

The writings of wishful thinking! We would be in a Civil War in a matter of minutes! The Magat Kooks are wishing this would happen as they would love to kill all Democrats! I'm not a "Fuck around and find out" guy, but I will defend me and mine!

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Chris Andrews's avatar

I think it's good to imagine this stuff, even if farfetched because we are in unchartered territory here. Holy shit.

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Hannah Olufs's avatar

Ok, that was fun.

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CellyBlue - I Do Know This!'s avatar

Great Article. I get it.

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