Susie Wiles, WH Chief of Staff, Steps In It

Wiles may be tough as nails, but she's also dumb as a box of rocks

A bad eyelift, Graves’ Disease, or antisocial personality disorder?

Susie Wiles may be tough as nails, but she’s also dumb as a rock. Now we have it on the record.

Vanity Fair delivers (once again) on what could be the story of the year: the complete evisceration of the Trump administration, using White House Chief of Staff Susie Wiles’s own words and observations.

Susie — supposedly a staunch Trump loyalist, puts it right out there, describing Trump as having “an alcoholic’s personality,” and criticizing Pam Bondi’s handling of the Epstein files, saying she completely “whiffed” influencers by giving them “binders full of nothingness,” and, “Then she said that the witness list, or the client list, was on her desk. There is no client list, and it sure as hell wasn’t on her desk.”

Know that this is just a teaser. This two-part series is the motherlode of schadenfreude, dished out by the president’s most inside insider.

Would love to let Sigmund have a go at analyzing this interview.

Machine Gun Lips Houlihan.

Susie Wiles obviously failed to make clear to writer Chris Whipple which of her comments should be off the record. It’s as if we’ve been invited to a life-drawing class, with Wiles as the nude model. She lays it bare in this series of interviews, conducted over the past year, each at a crisis point for the administration. Wiles may not have masterpiece-worthy curves, but it is really hard to look away as she exposes the gruesome ugliness of the Trump administration under unforgiving fluorescents.

Too many latkes.

Rounding out the interview is a series of carefully staged, yet highly unflattering and remarkably telling photos of Vance, Rubio, Leavitt, Miller, Scavino, Wiles, and Blair. Christopher Anderson’s photos will, no doubt, one day grace the pages of digital history books; they are that good. Rubio looks like the punching bag he is, the injection marks for the filler in Leavitt’s lips had not yet healed prior to the shoot, and Stephen Miller wears his slovenly paunch like a badge of honor. Wiles’s photos take the cake, however. She looks like she’s either posing for her photo ID as a psychiatric patient or that she’s had a really bad eyelift. Who to sue? Vanity Fair, her psychiatrist, or her plastic surgeon?

Straight out of Peaky Blinders.

This 2-part series is a must-read. You’ll enjoy the spectacle of Susie Wiles stepping into junkyard dogshit over and over.

Here are the goods:

Part 1: Susie Wiles, JD Vance, and the “Junkyard Dogs”: The White House Chief of Staff on Trump’s Second Term

Part 2: Susie Wiles Talks Epstein Files, Pete Hegseth’s War Tactics, Retribution, and More

If you’ve not got a Vanity Fair subscription, get on it! Your contribution will help them prepare for the lawsuit we know is already in the works.